My old roomie Christy came to visit me today. It had been a long while since our last run in. She and I are very different people in so many ways, yet the same too. She’s fiercely independent, she tackles relationships (that whole um I need some personal time and space please) like me, she’s silly, serious, loves to read, is brilliant, witty, and a million and half amazing things in one beautiful and spicy woman. She has made my life in Oklahoma so much brighter. My path here has been dense at times, lots of depression, lots of anxiety, and extremely bumpy with family, but Christy always was there next to me. She was a great roomie, but and even better sister. I wonder sometimes what life would be like for me, if I’d stayed in Tulsa and not come to OSU. I wonder if Christy and I would be attached at the hip like we used to be, or if we’d have grown the same ways we have. I always question my choices, sometimes more than others, and when I’m holed up in my room because of some argument with the roommates I currently have, I think about the lazy evenings eating order in Chinese with Christy on the sofa.
I think about that Meg sometimes, my first experience of living in a house on my own. I was working full time and being an “adult” for real, 4 years ago. So much has changed, and so much hasn’t. The world is a scary place, and in those 4 years I’ve been in love and heart broken more than once, I’ve moved 4 or 5 times, I have grown up, gone into debt, failed classes, passed classes, lost myself, met some amazing people, lost family, and regained them. I’m sure my road in Oklahoma isn’t finished yet, but sometimes I feel like I’m ready for a new chapter; my roots grow restless for a new pot to grow in, and the inklings are growing stronger. If I’m not careful I’ll rip the roots out and tear off on a new adventure without a thought.
No comments:
Post a Comment